25 People Who Had Lunatic Roommates.
Nathan Johnson
Published
05/15/2022
in
wtf
Some real nightmares.
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1.
Ooooofff this is a good one!!! My roommate from hell stole my 12k car, 4K computer, 12 pairs of shoes, my special edition gow ps4, $1,500 in rent and asked me what my favorite 4 numbers were so he could steal my card and try making several withdrawal attempts. Oh and he crashed my 2012 bmw… smh. -
2.
Yelled at me for reading my own books because it messed up the decor. Books were sorted by color and not subject and reading them made them look not as new. Yeah. My own books. -
3.
Said I was using my mom’s [passing away] (which had happened 1 week prior) to gain sympathy. This was because I had asked her to watch my dog while I went to my mom’s funeral. -
4.
Despite me being a high risk individual and me begging him to be careful, he refused to get vaccinated and caught the coronavirus at a party and then gave it to me. -
5.
When I was in college, my roommate was out of this world, she would ask my Parents to pay her side of the rent, bills, she would eat my groceries, take my car, her boyfriend basically lived with us. I finally had to kick her out. She even tried to have sex with me at one point. She knew I was a lesbian, so I guess she wanted to try things out with me? But I said NO WAY. -
6.
I had a roommate that would s**t in the shower and put it through the small holes of the drain. He never got it all. It was obviously disgusting. -
7.
I had gotten a friend of mine from college - one of my best friends at the time - a job at my company that would get him out of Arizona and a really toxic family life. He moved into my apartment in DC for a month or two with my girlfriend and me while he saved some cash after moving. The first night he stole her anxiety medication to go to sleep - like, 8 of them, and then it turned out he’d developed a massive drinking problem that he kept moderately hidden until I noticed the smell of booze on his breath in the morning car to work. He also passed out at the office at least once. Eventually, he became completely non functioning. He stole booze, money, pills, and started locking himself in his room and just never interacting with anyone. Eventually, as it had been three months and he never paid rent, I had to kick him out. He was fired the next day, and ended up wasting all the money he’d saved on booze and then wound up in a shelter for a bit. He then took a bus to Seattle and lived on someone’s couch for two years. We finally mended our friendship last year - it had been about 8 - and then he fell back into booze and drugs and I had to drive two hours to where he lives in Northern Arizona to take him to rehab. After dropping him off at rehab, I watched him take a phone call and then leave without going inside. He is early 30s and has an enlarged liver and heart issues from all the abuse, and so I’m pretty much under the assumption he’s going to [pass away] and there’s not much more I can do. Edit: To all those saying “f**k alcoholics,” like, ok whatever. I still love this person like a brother and my heart aches for him knowing he wants but can’t find a way out of the rabbit hole. -
8.
I had roommates there were 7th Day Adventists and would eat my food. They said they were not allowed to eat pork so I started buying only lunch meats that obviously contained pork but they still ate in anyway. -
9.
Thought it would be a good prank to put chicken feet in my bed while I was away for a weekend -
10.
Used my body bar soap to wash her bum and hands after pooping (normal here to use water and soap to clean yourself after pooping). Found out when I found a speck of poop on my soap. -
11.
He sold my guinea pigs to a pet store because he didn't like them. Yes, he knew about them when we moved in together. He was one of those "if it's not a dog I hate it" kind of people. -
12.
She kicked my cat so hard she almost killed her. We’d been friends since we were 15. F**k you, Samantha. ETA: This happened 30 years ago and I’ll never get over it. I was 21 and poor so saving her was a huge deal financially; the vet is a f*****g saint. I’m so thankful she survived the ordeal. She was a trooper. She lived to be 19. After Samantha moved out a mutual acquaintance told me it was sad I let a friendship go over money. F**k you, unique-named-person, too! Edit: I wasn’t there to see it. Another roommate was. -
13.
Camera in the bathroom -
14.
Not super terrible but we went to a party, he got drunk super quick and saw some people he didn't want to be around and walked home. About an hour later me and my other roommate headed home too. When we pulled into the driveway we saw lights on in the living room, which quickly went off. When we got inside we saw a massive person sized hole in the hallway wall into the bathroom. Our roommate was pretending to sleep and when we asked him what the f**k happened he said someone "broke in" didn't try to steal anything but just busted a hole in our wall (from inside of the bathroom into the hall I should add), then slipped out the still locked back door (they didn't see him laying on the couch at all either apparently). Edit: Dude was a compulsive liar. My favorite lie was that he had his whole head tattooed to look like a skull but it faded so no one can tell anymore. -
15.
I once had a roommate who kept cranking the temperature way up, I'm talking like 28 degrees Celsius or 85 Fahrenheit. The landlord kept coming over to turn it way down as he was paying the bill. This meant we had the landlord coming over basically every day for a month. Finally he turned the temperature to a very generous 22 Celsius set up a lock box to cover the thermostat. My roommate came home, got wasted, took a hammer and smashed the box to pieces and turned the temperature up to 28 degrees again. This by itself was just mainly amusing but he he also was stealing my stuff, borrowing money without paying it back, and hosting late night dance parties to Nelly Furtado music. He claimed he had never used a vacuum in his life and didn't know how. One time he put a frozen pizza in the oven together with the cardboard. I smelled burning and raced downstairs to remove smouldering paper from the oven before it caught fire and burnt our house down. I asked him what he was thinking and he said 'that's the way we do it in Spain.' No shame, no apology. -
16.
He was technically my boyfriend. But he was staying with me so he was also my roommate. Anyway, caught him cheating and promptly kicked him out. Since he didn't have key to the apartment, I left my place unlocked while I was at work so that he could get his s**t out. Which, he didn't do. I ended up dropping his s**t off st his mom's house. What he did do instead was steal my pet snake. I don't know what he did to him. Like if he just let him go outside, if he took him with him. I know he's not in my apartment. It's really not that big of a place and I tore it up every single day for nearly a month straight trying to find him. He had escaped once before when his old enclosure broke but I found him within a few hours. The enclosure I had for him after that incident was escape proof. And there's absolutely no trace of him anywhere. I have two cats, both of which would have tore him to pieces had they had the chance. But again, there's no sign of anything. He was just gone. The s**tty thing is, I didn't notice until a few days after the fact. If you know snakes, they spend a lot of time hiding. So, during those few days between me kicking him out and me realizing he was gone, I figure my snake was curled up inside his little cave. But then feeding day came, and i flipped up the cave and saw he wasn't there. Frantically searched the whole enclosure, and he was nowhere. So yeah, he did something to my snake. -
17.
One of my first flatmates in London was weirdly into me. One time I took a friend home cause she was too drunk to take the tube by herself. My flatmate saw us getting home, asked me if she was my girlfriend and I said yes hoping he'd leave me alone after this... big mistake. He asked if he could sleep with us in my bed (my friend was passed out at this point), said he "wouldn't do anything, just wanted some human contact". Creepy as hell, moved out shortly after that. -
18.
One of many great stories: he took a s**t on his bedroom floor to protest me spraying febreeze in the bathroom, quoting "your s**t stinks too". -
19.
To name a few things: - Would have the loudest sex one could have with their partner. Loud enough that I got at least 3 unique complaints from neighbors - Physically threatened me on multiple occasions - Cooked disgusting meals and covered the kitchen in food scraps and generally did nothing to clean - Her dog would poop on the floor pretty much every day, sometimes more than once (and took no effort to train away the behavior) - Invited herself to my neighbor's party when I was there, even though she wasn't invited - proceeded to make an a*s of herself - Would make constant targeted comments about me smoking weed, even though we're in a legal state - Destroyed 3 cars in her 8 month stay (all in unique ways!) - Threatened s**cide to make me feel like her behavior was somehow my fault These are just what I can remember at the moment... -
20.
He came home completely drunk. Opened the fridge. Yelled at us for eating something of his (which he already ate earlier today). Pulled his pants down. Pissed into the fridge. Was trying to pull his pants back. Failed, fell on the floor. Fell asleep on the floor. Snoring. That was not the first time. We each had a small fridge to keep out stuff away from him. We each had a separate contract, so couldn't legally throw him out. -
21.
He would always leave his dog for too long and she would s**t on the floor. It was an old dog and im sure at one point it wasn't an issue. The problem was this guy didn't even try to do anything to fix the issue. I'd get home from work every day and walk into a house that punched me in the face with s**t smell when I opened the door. We talked to him about it over and over again and he'd just blow it off. What did he finally do when he got fed up with us complaining? He put the dog down. We just wanted him to maybe come walk her while on break at work. His job was 5 minutes down the road. I can still feel the tension in the room when we found out she was gone. -
22.
Wrecked my collection of Japanese kitchen knives. Ate the lunch I had prepared for my child for school. Prepped and entire Costco pack of chicken breasts that I had purchased and claimed them all as hers. Left a bottle of hair dye on the floor after dying her hair and ruined the hardwood and carpet. The list goes on and on. She was a classmate of my wife’s who was down on her luck and we let rent a room off of us for a few months to help her out. At the end of 4 months she packed her stuff up and said that she didn’t think she owed us anything as she is a single woman and we were a family of three. She did not pay a single bill or for any groceries for the entire 4 months she stayed at our place. I hope she is doing well. -
23.
She stole my underwear, wore them, then reported me to our boarding school for having personal "inappropriate" underwear when I confronted her for stealing them. She got in trouble for theft, but I still got in trouble for having clothes outside the dress code even though I threw them out after I saw them in her dirty laundry hamper. -
24.
Boiled her diva cup in the kitchen, at 6am on a Sunday morning, waking the whole house to the putrid smells of boiling off, stale, blood. Followed buy occupying the whole kitchen for 6 hours to meal prep for a whole week. She was confused why everyone was grossed out at the smell, and oblivious to the massive entitlement on the second offense. She got angry when I strolled in around 10am to make some breakfast. On a f*****g weekend.
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